I miss you so much

No more long distance

5 DAYS and I have a sex playlist.....

11 DAYS

Oh I just can't wait to see you:)

Two weeks

I'll be in Kampala in two weeks x

We were meant to be xxx

This is how I feel

The 11th

In 23 days 11 hours 28 minutes and 48 seconds I will be in your arms.

In 91 days 10 hours 27 minutes and 48 seconds I will be with you 5 years.

Every fight, every tear, every lonely day waiting for you is worth all the wonderful, beautiful, unique moments we have together. xxx

Emily and Alan love each other very much...

24 DAYS!!

I love you and I want to have your babies

All you who sleep tonight - by Vikram Seth

All you who sleep tonight
Far from the ones you love,
No hand to left or right
And emptiness above -
Know that you aren't alone
The whole world shares your tears,
Some for two nights or one,
And some for all their years.

It was so wonderful to be able to talk face to face! It really meant so much to me xx

Having the LOLs at their picnic....

This is heartbreaking and wonderful

http://mostamazingviews.com/man-with-alzheimer-buy-flower-to-wife/

I hope if I get Alzheimers I'll remember to do these things for you! Maybe go get you a cheese board one day or a pastry! xx

These two young ones didn't even know how in love they'd be! xxx

You're my one and Only

I was writing your letter and this came on. I started to smile and cry at the same time. I read over letters you sent me and it was such a wake up call. Even though I get mad at you, I realise you are the best person in the whole world and I am so so lucky to have the best person in the world love me so much.
And I love you too. With every ounce of me xxxx

Two drifters, Off to see the world...

Can you get me this too when you propose?

A Sad week

I'm feeling down about us this week. I feel lost and sad and frustrated.
I miss this.

A Sad week

I'm feeling down about us this week. I feel lost and sad and frustrated.
I miss this.

This is how I feel today

I love you...

 

"I get carried away,
Carried away from you,
And I'm hoping and I'm praying,
'Cause I'm sorry,
Sorry 'bout that,
Sorry 'bout things that I said,
Always let it get to my head."

Miaow!

I miss you. Xxx

Oh no!

Miaow? x

Je T'aime

I'm really unwell, wish we could cuddle on the couch with tea while you minded me!
I miss you I hope squash went well xxx

"Honey just put your sweet lips on my lips we could just kiss like real people do."

I adore you

I loved you once,
I loved you twice,
I love you more than banoffie pies.

I envision this song playing IF I was to ever walk down as "aisle"...

Good to be back

It's great to be back so I can finally talk to my favourite person again:)

I miss you

Just two more days and I can finally hear your wonderful voice.

You're the man of my dreams xxxxx

You are amazing

You really-have gone above and beyond for my birthday! First the sunflowers to my house in Limerick on the day which were so so beautiful!
Then the extraordinary package of African bags, purses, earrings, mirror and cat statues with a stunning card!
Finally the most lovely quote from F.Scott Fitzgerald that made me realise that you adore me, you know me and you're proud of me and you want me and you love me.
That means so so so much.

I am so sorry I left my phone in Cork and we can't talk, i'm so lonely for you!
But I am so so lucky to have such a fantastic boyfriend xxxxxxx

A few of my favourite things and a bit about me....if anyone from the future finds this

Movies:

1)Big fish
2)Seeking a Friend at the End of the World
3)300
4)Nowhere Boy
5)Garden State

Albums:

1)Arcade Fire- Suburbs
2)Beyoncé- 4
3)Postal Service-Give up
4)Wyclef Jean-Ecleftic
5)Arctic Monkeys- AM
6)Bloc Party- Weekend in the City

Food:

1)Sushi
2)Fish of any kind
3)Moroccan
4)Fruit (Mango and Pineapple and Nectarines precisely but all)
5)Paella

Drink:

1) Tea
2) Beer (Tsing Dao)
3) Mango/Pineapple juice
4) Wine (Red mainly)
5)Whiskey and Coke or Whiskey and Orange

Past Times:

1)Travelling
2) Chatting
3) Scrapbooking
4)Dancing (Salsa)
5)Martial Arts
6)Baking (if someone else buys the ingredients)
7) Knitting/ Crafting
8) Singing and Songwriting (including poems)

Colour: Purple

Number: 7

Season: Autumn

Possessions:

1) Collins (teddy gang too)
2) Photos
3)Jewellery especially rings and necklace!
4)Teapots/Mugs
5) Letters
6)Electronics
7)Umbrella from friends in China
8)Heraldo (Giraffe)

Things I love:

1)Cuddle/Kiss/Talk/Have Sex/Laugh/Play Wii/Bake:Hang out with Alan
2)Listen to my ipod in bed in the dark
3)Go for a long refreshing, windy, walk when i'm sad that makes me realise i'm lucky
4)Drink Tea in bed or on couch when reading or watching my many shows I love
5)Dancing, I love love dancing.
6)Getting post (I love getting post of any kind)
7)Writing others letters, cards or making them something be it a podcast or scrabbook, to see their faces!
8)Stepping foot in a brand new country with brand new country smell.
9)Succeeding at something even if it's small
10) Taking off my jeans and bra and getting into something comfy and warm
11)Dressing up and feeling really pretty

I miss you

I have no idea if we'll get to chat or if I will hear from you. I don't know how your day is going or what you're doing. I am presuming you're safe because you said you would be and I trust you.
I am lonely and missing you so much. xx

Thursday's children

We've already gone so so far:) I'm proud of us.

Today I'm thankful that we've had so much opportunity to travel, see the world and open our minds to new things.

Heartbreakingly lovely

Thursday

We were both born on a Thursday. And Thursdays Child has far to go....

We're going to go far my love xxx

This is Alan

If in years to come someone comes across this little blog of love in long distance I think you should be able to picture what Alan is like in all his greatness.

Firstly he has the cutest smile that lights up the room and makes your belly and your chest feel like its going to burst.

Alan has a bump on his nose that you just want to kiss (and sometimes I want to panel beat it in with a teeny tiny hammer and chisel because that would look funny)

He is so tall, he's like this long, lean, skinny jean wearing, t-shirt with funny prints sporting, fancy sneakered handsome hunk.

His stomach is perfect for licking, kissing and lying on. I love his happy trail. Like a path to pleasure :) Makes him so manly.

Alan tends to have a moustache. I don't love it.... :P

Alan has such a deep voice, it is both comforting and arousing. And when he sings White Christmas and dances with you around his kitchen you feel like you're the only person that matters in the whole wide world.

Alan has started this new thing of repeating words/phrases in threes. I am still trying to work out the reason behind this. If the future has discovered this and it's become an epidemic then you now have 1st hand evidence of its origins.

Alan kisses me on the nose and even though it drives me mad when i'm trying to kiss him normally in a couple way to be romantic, when he does it just out of the blue and not to annot me, it's just what I need to feel special! :)

When Alan cries he makes this noise of pure release and sadness and it makes my heart break. All I want to do when he cries his kneel on the floor with him and hold him in my arms.

When Alan farts I go into shock and I feel like i'm back in the trenches of war. To clarify I've never even been in a war.

Alan laughs like a seagull and squints his eyes really tight like he's going to explode any second and throws back his head. His laugh makes me so happy.

Alan is a caring, understanding and patient person. He is my bestfriend and the only person in the whole world who could save me from myself (because there are days when i'm my own worst enemy)

Don't be too jealous, i'll understand if you are, Alan is the best. xx

Today I'm grateful because...

We're luckier than a lot of people in this world.

I love you

Alan, I know I can do and be anyone with you by my side xxx
Today i'm thankful for you, everything you are and how you treat me xx

We'll be back in Cork together soon:) That's what I'm grateful for today!

This means a lot to me even if it is Greys Anatomy

20 things I want to do with you!

1) Get a photobooth photo of us-(Cheesy black and white one)
2) Get tattoos
3)Bungee Jump together
4)Go paintballing together
5)Move in together
6)Married and babies etc
7)Travel together
8)Go on an overnight train together
9)Stay in a fancy hotel
10) Skinny Dip together
11) Get something pierced together
12) Play Cluedo together
13) Stay up all night together
14) Get Drunk together
15)Take mushrooms together
16)Make a sex tape
17)Make something together (jigsaw, blanket, table, painting, anything)
18)Have a midnight feast
19)Day long Movie Marathon
20)Collaborate on a song

Oh miaow xxx

Day 6

Today I'm grateful for...

My fabulous girlfriend who loves me, takes care of me and is my best friend through all the tough times as well as the good ones. Xx

Day 11

I am happy because I had a nice weekend catching up with Paul and I feel that my friends are secure, my boyfriend is secure and my future is in sight xx

Day 10

I'm happy because on my first ever run I completed a triathlon hahaha!

We've been together...

Result: 1660 days

It is 1660 days from the start date to the end date, end date included

Or 4 years, 6 months, 17 days including the end date

Alternative time units

1660 days can be converted to one of these units:

• 143,424,000 seconds
• 2,390,400 minutes
• 39,840 hours
• 1660 days
• 237 weeks (rounded down)

Day 9

I'm happy because we sorted it out. Also because we had phone sex :)

Day 8

I am happy because I am finished University. I have no more lectures or tutorials. Just two essays and two exams and then I am free to start my life and do amazing things.
I will accomplish, i will travel, I will meet new people, I will love.
Above all I am to be happy and remember that even during the bad times, I am alive and therefore I am capable of doing anything.
I am proud of myself xxx

Day 7

I'm happy because three years of stress and upset has been sorted and I can move on!

Day 5

I am happy because...

It's the weekend!!! :)

Day 6

Today I am happy because I handed in my essay and I have a day to relax!

Day 4 (after an extended break)

Today I am happy because...

I have good friends.

xx

We'll be ok xx

Day 5

I'm happy because i've had a lovely morning with my granny!

I love you xxx

Beyoncé Mine

Day 4

I'm happy because I had a lovely time with your family last night and I posted off your package today! :) xx

Your family adore you!

Your Dad was very sad after hanging up the phone with you. He was worried you seemed down and I think he missed you desperatly at his birthday!

When I told him that I sent you pictures of the T-shirt and you were laughing, he totally cheered up and was delighted you were in a good mood!

I love you so much and you're such a loved person, it's overwhelming :)

Day 3...

Today I am happy because....

I know that I always have a fantastic family who will always support me.

Day 3

Today I am happy because I received an email telling me my donation of 5 euro a month to Simon community has just seen a homeless man move into a room off the street! I was sent photos of the room and I'm just thrilled that I could give something so small and helped another human being!

Day 2

Today I am happy because of many reasons. One, the love of my life is alive and well. Two, I have been headhunted for another Masters and three because a student of mine who I am really fond of from Beijing has just been accepted to an amazing school in Canada and i'm proud of her and her bravery and I know she will do great things.

Day 2...

Today I am happy because...

I have an amazing girlfriend who cares about me so so much:)

Day 1

Today I am happy because....

... I found out that I'll have plenty of money to enjoy myself over the next 4 months and plenty to have a really special time with my girlfriend too:)

100 days of happiness

I am going to do 100 days of happiness so that even when i'm stressed out or lonely or angry I will have to find something good about the day and thus realise not everything is as bad as it seems and also tat positivity is important for us.

It's a good idea for you too :)

So hear goes...

DAY 1: Today I realise i'm in a long term relationship with my one true love. I am so lucky xxx

Hey, I read your letter. I think it's good that you sent it to me. I hate to think of you being insecure or sad because of our relationship. I don't want you to think that I talk to you like I talk to anyone else, I don't. Talking to you and hearing about how you are is the highlight of my day. You're the only person I'll really let my true feelings be known to. The last few weeks have been hectic and I've been really anxious about not having enough time to talk to you- both because I want to hear from you and I know you want to make sure I'm ok but also because I just want to talk to you. I guess I forgot that other things are important in making us feel good in the relationship. Like letting you know when I'm thinking of you. I don't want you to be insecure. I want you to know that you're the most important person to me. Of course this trip will change me but not as profoundly as you think. I'll still adore you, still think about you still miss you. I'll still look forward to seeing you, bringing you everywhere when you're over. I'll still love you.You mean the world to me, and feel free to forget that because I plan on reminding you. We won't be ok. We'll be far better than that. We'll be great.

Always yours,

Al Xxx

My Letter to you from Friday Night....

Dear Alan,

It's 5am and I haven't slept. I tried to at 2am but lying in the dark made me more awake than i'd felt all day. This week I've been an insomniac, desperately seeking sleep but not allowing myself enough hours.
It's ok, tonight I enjoy being awake. It's quiet, except for the rain, I can hear nothing. I feel like i'm the only person in the whole world who is awake and I feel blissfully alone. It's like my secret.  So I read the Time Travellers Wife again. It was nice to delve into someone else's relationship for a change. I could immerse myself in their time apart, distance, upset, fear joy etc instead of ours.

This time it's harder. This time you're away and instead of being the same, in your own environment, you're changing. That's not to say it's a bad change- it's just a necessary change-inevitable since you're doing something so remarkable and adventurous and new. You're learning more about yourself and what you want/what you're capable of.
This excites and terrifies me. When I was in China I knew my emotions. I knew myself, I understood and controlled my changing "self". I knew you stayed the same in Cork.

Now I don"t know your emotions, needs, wants. I don't know your changes and I can't control it. It may not even be a dramatic change, perhaps unnoticeable. The fear is not knowing.
I'm afraid that all of this may, potentially, lead you away from me.

We talk about your day to day but not really how you feel. It's friendly, not really loving or how we used to talk-just factual as if you were talking to Katelyn or Steve or Doc. I miss the way you used to talk to me.
We've argued about Katelyn- I know this has pissed you off. I know this has upset you and I'm in a dilemma of telling you how I feel and risking pushing you away or bottling up and resenting you.
I just wish you didn't put me in these situations- that sensitivity and understanding would factor in before these situations arise.
I don't want to tell you any of this- that everyday I feel I know you less and i'm afraid you're wanting me/loving me/understanding me less and less. It's only been three weeks and I'm already so unsure.

I know you'll tell me it'll be fine and that i'm being ridiculous. To the point that I might not even give you this letter. Although I want to show you how I feel, what goes through my head.

I don't want you to get the wrong idea, i'm not trying to be dramatic or claim you don't love me or want me. I'm trying to share with you a piece of me. My thoughts at the moment, what motivates my worries. I'm sharing with you my loneliness and fears and the reason i'm reading a book about two true lovers torn apart by time so that for an hour I'm not torn apart by it-by the fear of not knowing or being able to control how you feel. By giving you my heart-my most precious possession and being terrified everyday you're away from me that you'll forget you have my heart in your hand.

I guess I just wanted to let you know that I miss you. I miss you especially when we talk. It's then I miss you the most, the way we used to talk, the way you were to me before on the phone, loving, cute, attentive instead of now when you're just friendly or sometimes sarcastic, narky and quick to snap. It reminds me of the fight we had at the beginning of your last week in Cork with me, the way you were to me on the bus before the lunch. I'm frightened you resent me deep down but feel you've no other option but to be with me.

You're foreign to me at the moment- i'm uncertain how you feel day to day and i'm frightened of asking or bringing it up or being upset by the way you'd treat me for fear you won't get it and you'll just push me away more.

I don't even know if this is just my form of catharsis or if I plan to send it. I don't know if you'd read it the way it's intended or if you'll just see it as melodrama. Who knows.

This happy baby

Fell in love with you xxx

Awake

I stayed up all night because I couldn't sleep. Not sure why I couldn't sleep, it's been like this all week.
This night in particular, I wrote a letter, one so cathartic and honest that it has left me relieved and revived. I feel free to be a better person in myself.
I am moving on from the past, from the fear and jealousy and anger and disappointment.
I want to be a happier, lighter and more confident woman. So I'm forgiving and forgetting my old torments and i'm moving forward. x

Sneaky Mom....

Found this on your phone....didn't know you took it.

http://www.huffingtonpost.jp/2014/04/03/50years-photo_n_5081519.html

I love them....

We'll be ok. It's still early days and we're just settling into a routine. I love you and you love me. Have a good week. Keep yourself occupied. I always look forward to chatting:)

It's tough but so are we....

It's been two weeks since you embarked on your 5 month work placement to Uganda.
I'm so proud of you for going over there and for working with Trocaire. You are going to really change lives and that is such a wonderful gift to give any human being.

It's tough, for many reasons. We will fight (and we have) and we will have lonely moments and jealous moments and angry moments and also happy ones too.

We've gotten through shitty situations before and come out better, just need to keep talking, telling each other how we feel and really trying to understand the other persons feelings.

I hope I can be as good a support as you've been for me.
I love you xxxx

Now Alan goes off.....to Uganda!

I Love You

Ya, that's right. I love you.